Thursday, March 24, 2011

Outtie

Outtie is a douche word straight out of the film Clueless. While that film and just about everything in it are near and dear to my heart, there are some phrases that I just never want to hear again. "Cher, I'm outtie" is one of them.

After Googling, you would not BELIEVE how many online arguments there are about whether the spelling is "outtie" or "Audi," like "I'm Audi 5000" (excuse me while I heave). My point? People are idiots! Oh wait, no... my point is actually that outtie is ridiculous and douchey.

This gets me to wondering, though...is outtie used in other douchey ways? Like in place of the word outing or outfit?

OH NO! I'm giving them ideas!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Deece

Today's word has a double meaning, making it twice as douchey!

Deece (pronounced like fleece) could mean decent, as in, "Hey, you did a pretty deece job on that presentation." Or it could mean deceased, as in, "Don't mess with me Gramps, you're borderline deece and I will kick your ass" (although why you would say this, I just don't know.

Your best bet is to combine the two for maximum douche effect: "The undertaker did a deece job of doing the makeup for the deece".

I feel dirty now.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Flav

Flav. You know, like flavor. Like creepy, giant-clock-wearing rapper man-whore Flavor Flav. Like stupid, so-not-as-good-as-Otter-Pops popsicle Fla-Vor-Ice.

Anyway. The word flav is just one of those words that hits my ear wrong, like the word rural. It's kind of like a song ending that doesn't have that final beat to resolve it, and you sit there just waiting for that last note and then feel dissatisfied when you don't hear it.

P.S. Remember Seth Green in Can't Hardly Wait? He said "Why you gotta be wastin' my flava?"

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Maverick

Guest post:

I know this is an "older" word, but it still cracks me up when I think about Sarah Palin and McCain using it, overandoverandoverandover.  Maverick is commonly used by people who don't know what it means.  Unless you can fly a 4G inverted dive directly over a Mig28 and have a Polaroid to prove it, please refrain from using it! You will only embarrass yourself.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Presh

Presh ~ Used in place of Precious
Ugh, again with the removal of a syllable. "The puppy is très presh!" And you are très douchey. 

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Deets

Deets: Used in place of "details".

It sounds like you are asking for insect repellent. Please, for the love of all you consider holy, don't shorten a word from two syllables to one. It's lazy and honestly, quite douchey.

"I called the 'rents to get the deets for this evening. They sent me to the camping store." See how confusion could happen? Think twice, speak once! 

-Guest post

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Cray Cray

A really, really stupid way to say 'crazy'.

Per Markus (paraphrased): "Someone posted this on Facebook today referring to how crazy the twinky gay teens are at the club on Thursday nights. He was trying to be cute, but he sounded douchey."

It also totally sounds like BABY TALK. Gross.